Oblivion Results - 9.5.10

[Kirk Noble]

As Oblivion comes on the air, Steven Martyn and P.K. Jacob-Sterling can both be seen in the ring, engaging in a tie-up as the first match gets underway.

Keith Oswalt: We’re getting straight to action on this final episode of Oblivion before Autumn Annihilation.

Eric Witz: Newcomer Steven Martyn takes on P.K. Jacob-Sterling in our opening match, should be a fun match.

As the two engage in a tie up, Martyn goes to take Sterling down to the mat with a double leg takedown, however as he shoots in for the takedown, Sterling backs up and throws his boot into Martyn’s face, knocking him back. After having kicked Martyn in the face, Sterling runs at him and takes him down with a lariat. Following the lariat, Sterling lifts Martyn back up quickly and punches him a few times before whipping him to the ropes and running after. As Martyn hit’s the ropes and bounces back, Sterling leaps up and hits him with a running leg lariat again taking Martyn down to the mat. Hopping to his feet after doing this, Sterling runs to the ropes and hits Martyn with a lionsault, going for the cover, 1...2... Kick out!

Following the kick out, Sterling gets up and grins as he grabs Martyn by the back of the head and pulls him to his knees, however instead of lifting him to his feet, Sterling sternly holds Martyn’s head at his knee level and begins to pound into his face with several high intensity kicks. After delivering ten of these vicious shots, P.K. Jacob-Sterling lets out a vicious yell before lifting Martyn up and hitting him with the S.M.G. (Suplex-lift Spinning Facebuster)! After hitting this move and looking at Martyn’s potentially broken nose gushing blood, Sterling shakes his head as he stands up and places a single foot on Martyn’s chest to cover him,

1...

2...

3!

Ike Rose: Here is your winner, at 1 minute and 2 seconds, P.K. Jacob-Sterling.

Eric Witz: So much for a fun match, it hardly started.

Keith Oswalt: Sterling definitely made an impact.

As Sterling stands over Martyn looking down at him, he finally takes his eyes off of Steven Martyn and looks at Ike Rose and tells him to give him the microphone.

P.K. Jacob-Sterling: Really? That’s the best competition I’m going to get? You know, when he challenged me last week, I legit thought he would be a contender. Guess I was wrong. So, how about this, at Autumn Annihilation next week, Jeremy Sterling and Kurt Noble book me against somebody who actually can wrestle? I’ve proven myself before when I beat Johnny Noble, and I should have had Obscene beat, but that guy was afraid, and tonight, I proved myself again, I’m the best…

Suddenly, the screen above the entrance flickers on, showing the inside of a darkened, well-decorated room. In the center of the shot is a red leather armchair. An unidentified man with long brown hair is sitting in the chair. The fans' cheers for Sterling turn to a mixed reaction for the anticipation, not knowing who it is... until he turns around, the lights in the room come up, and the man turns around in the chair. If the attire didn't make it obvious, the face does, and it's a face that many KOP fans were happy to go without: that of Nathan Neale.

Nathan Neale: You know, I was planning to eventually add a diary room on the last season of The Neale World. This place'll get a lot of use when Season 2 starts at the end of the month...

Oh, I'm sorry, am I interrupting the new kid?

Mouthing the word new kid in the ring, P.K. Jacob-Sterling looks at Neale, almost as if to ask him who he was.

Nathan Neale: Eh. I don't care, I could kick his ass anyway. As you all already know, I am your one and only Reality Revolution, Nathan Neale. However, you may not know that I've been gone for the past month due to a broken hand I suffered back at Retur-

P.K. Jacob-Sterling: Kick my ass? I’m undefeated baby! You can’t beat me, but I guess beating a reality star would give me some added exposure, and everybody knows that exposure equals cash, so you know what? Let’s go, me and you, Autumn Annihilation.

P.K. Jacob-Sterling drops his mic after he says this as he looks at Nathan Neale, who whips off his shuttle shades and begins to speak again.

Nathan Neale: Fine. You want a match? You got it. But after I show you what it's like when reality hits you in the face, I want you to leave the ring immediately, so these people will not only get to bask in my greatness... but also so that I can reveal next season's co-host as I prepare to grow the Neale World brand. Until then, Pooky, try and stay out of trouble. I don't want you to have an excuse next Sunday.

The feed on the screen cuts out as the announcers discuss the new match for Autumn Annihilation.

Keith Oswalt: Looks like Nathan Neale plans on returning and making a major impact by giving Sterling his first loss!

Eric Witz: You know, after what we just saw, I’d bet money that Sterling doesn’t lose his match against Neale.

[Kirk Noble]

The scene opens up in Kurt Noble's office. He is running through a load of papers and sighs loudly. Getting good staff shouldn't be this hard.

There is a knock at the door.

Knoble: Come in.

The door opens to reveal...JOHN PARKER!






This is the pause for your cheers.







And we're back. He walks over and takes a seat opposite Kurt.

Knoble: What can I do you for? I thought I fired you?

JDP: You did. But I could really do with the money. I have children to support, man! Children! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

John breaks down sobbing and drops to his knees. He clutches at Kurt's hand and pulls him closer as he wails.

Knoble: John. John!

This gets our hero's attention.

Knoble: I know you don't have any children. So that won't work on me.

JDP: ..............o. Well then. I'm applying for the janitor's position plz.

Knoble: I'm sorry, John. You've proved to be a poor employee who isn't consistent enough for a cleaning job. I'm afraid I'm going to have to say no.

JDP: But...but........but the turtle!

Knoble: And that's not funny either. Now please leave, and send in the next applicant.

John gets to his feet with a sad look as we fade out.

[Kirk Noble]

The fans in attendance begin to raise their heads to attention as "Awesome" by Plies begins to play throughout the arena and the smoke begins to trail around the arena, red and blue lights wafting around, and a sound like police sirens echoing.

I'm on my New York Shit,
I think I'm hot son!
White girls staring at me looking like she lost somethin'!
I don't kno what her problem is,
I hope she fuckin' say somethin'!
Asked her what da problem?
She said "You're fuckin' awesome!"

Dru Tha Merc begins to walk down the ramp, rocking bulletproof vest and baseball cap, leaning to the left and high-fiving a few fans. He leans to the right, and is about to high-five a few fans as well, before he decides the better of it, and pulls a 'too slow' on a little kid, and begins walking to the ring. A chuckle leaving him.

Ike Rose: The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a ten minute time limit. Making his way to the ring, from Tampa Bay, Florida, weighing in at 297 pounds, Dru Tha Merc!

Jus bought a drop top!
Feel like I'm in L.A.!
Everybody watchin' me,
Feel like I'm da movie!
Homie got his first block,
Took it from an Oe yay!
Judge asked me who da shooter?
Told him "No comprende!"
Few dudes gotta whack,
Certain names, can't say.
Streets won't hire him,
Him have no resume.

Dru slides into the ring, the big brawler slapping his chest twice and pointing to the fans, motioning his fingers like a gun. He takes off his hat, and tosses it, frisbee style to the fans before he cracks his neck twice, and gets ready for his match, the ref eyeing him suspiciously before patting him down. The ref pulls a black tire iron from the back of Dru's belt, and wags a finger at him. Dru shrugs, his face conveying that he could care less and waits for the bell to ring.

The lights in the arena dim as "Black Celebration" by Depeche Mode begins to play. Immediately the fans boo loudly, and after a few moments Obscene walks out from behind the curtain, wearing a plain white t-shirt and black jeans. He stares at the fans with a malevolent expression on his face and slowly walks towards the ring and then up the ring steps. He climbs into the ring, and ignoring the boos he backs up into a corner of the ring, giving a sly nod to his small following of fans way back in the arena.

Ike Rose: And his opponent, from Monterrey, Mexico, weighing in at 190 pounds…

Before Ike Rose can finish introducing Obscene, Obscene sprints towards Dru Tha Merc and nails him with a leaping lariat!

Keith Oswalt: Explosive start by Obscene, he’s using his speed to his advantage!

Eric Witz: I can’t believe it, but Obscene’s actually being intelligent.

Having hit the leaping lariat on Dru, Obscene stays atop of him, pounding him with several fists. After doing this, the referee pulls Obscene off of Dru, too start the match, however instead of being able to separate the two, Obscene stomps Dru several times before lifting him up and finally turning to look at the ref and shouting “ring the fucking bell!” Obliging to do so, the referee starts the match as Obscene whips Dru to the ropes and Obscene hops up to the second rope and backflipping over Dru Tha Merc and hitting him with an inverted DDT backbreaker by cracking Dru’s back over his knee and then slamming him to the mat.

After doing this, Obscene again gets up and begins to stomp on Dru, further preventing him from getting up to his feet. After doing this a few times, Obscene finally runs to the ropes and back to Dru, jumps up, and hit’s a knee smash on Dru’s face. After doing this, Obscene goes for a quick cover on Dru Tha Merc,

1...

2...

Dru kicks out powerfully, throwing Obscene straight up, however as Obscene lands, he hits Dru with a leg drop!

Keith Oswalt: Damn, that was incredible! How did Obscene pull that off!?

Eric Witz: He was probably trying to think of a cool way to hurt himself.

After hitting the leg drop, Obscene lifts Dru back up to his feet and delivers a few shots to the stomach before finally kicking him in the stomach and driving him head first into the mat with a DDT. After hitting the DDT, Obscene runs to the corner and climbs to the top rope before leaping off backwards and hitting a phoenix splash on Dru Tha Merc! After hitting the huge move, Obscene goes for a cover,

1...

2...

Kick out!

Despite the big move, Dru is again able to kick out and Obscene seems infuriated. Slamming his fists on the mat, Obscene gets out of the ring and looks under it before grabbing a steel chair. Seeing the chair, the referee argues with Obscene to not use it as Dru rolls out of the ring. Going to swing the chair in Dru’s face, Obscene is surprised when Dru catches the chair and rips it out of Obscene’s hands and now swings it at Obscene, however Obscene moves out of the way and lets Dru drive the chair into the floor. After dropping the chair, Obscene grins as he now hops onto the steel barricade and finally jumps from the barricade and leg drops onto Dru’s neck, driving him face first into the steel chair. After doing this, Obscene again lifts Dru up off of the ground and now takes his head and drives it repeatedly into the steel barricade. After busting Dru open, Obscene finally rolls him into the ring.

Eric Witz: I think Obscene may think that he is Dru.

Keith Oswalt: What?

Eric Witz: He’s hurting Dru, normally he would only be hurting himself.

Keith Oswalt: You’re an idiot.

After throwing Dru into the ring, Obscene gets up on the apron and stands here before grinning and leapfrogging to the top rope and finally preforming a springboard 450 splash on Dru Tha Merc! After hitting the incredible move, Obscene hooks Dru’s leg,

1...

2...

3!

Ike Rose: Here is your winner, via pinfall, at 6 minutes and 12 seconds, Obscene!

Keith Oswalt: That match was completely dominated by Obscene, he definitely is looking very good headed towards Autumn Annihilation.

Eric Witz: He finally seems to be interested in hurting other people, he's finally understanding wrestling!

[Kirk Noble]

We are backstage with Alex Avice, the newly signed Lucas Kane Young and Lucas’s mentor Carl Maloney. Lucas is dressed in blue denim jeans, white t-shirt, tanned Timberland boots and a black leather jacket. Carl Maloney is dressed in black trousers, short sleeve white shirt and black shoes.

Alex Avice: Hi and welcome to this interview with me Alex Avice and the newly signed talent to Kingdom of Pride Lucas Kane Young.

Lucas Young: Thanks Alex, just call me Lucas. This here is my mentor and Uncle Carl Maloney, the reason why we have different surnames is because my Uncle changed his to his wife’s name. To me that shows his under the thumb but he reckons he did it because he loves her.

Carl Maloney: Don’t be cheeky Lucas, I maybe retired but it doesn’t stop me from kicking your arse. You need to focus on this interview here and your training as you maybe making your debut but don’t mean you’re going to have it easy.

Lucas looks at his Uncle with the look of “Yes I know that” whilst not saying anything at all.

Alex Avice: So Lucas we know that your Uncle Carl has proved himself in the wrestling world but how do you think you’re going to do?

Lucas Young: Well to be honest I don’t look as far as my opponent and take every day as it comes. I’m not bothered who my opponent is either way I’m going to go out there to entertain the crowd and to win. I have not entered the wrestling business to be a bully or to cheat my way up the ladder like some here in Kingdom of Pride; I have entered the wrestling business to earn everything I get. I intend on having Gold here in Kingdom of Pride but I intend on earning it, I know I will have to start from the bottom and work my way up and to be fair I don’t think it will take me long but I will entertain the fans on my way.

Alex Avice: Well you are certainly confident and I’m sure our fans are going to like that, if you had a choice, who would you pick?

Carl Maloney: I’m sure my nephew Lucas would say the Top Dog here that happens to be Chris Hart at the moment but me myself think he needs to earn that so I would say he needs to start off with someone like P.K. Jacob Sterling or Steve Martyn.

Lucas just nods his head in agreement as he knows that his Uncle knows best being that he was the best of his time.

Alex Avice: I don’t know much about Steve Martyn but that don’t mean his going to be easy, I know P.K. Jacob Sterling and he defiantly isn’t going to be easy then again no one here in Kingdom of Wrestling is easy. Just one last question, Lucas what are you plans here in Kingdom of Pride?

Lucas Young: My plans here in Kingdom of Pride are to entertain the crowd, kick arse and have fun doing it. I’m young and for a rookie I’m really wise in the ring, yes I may make mistakes sometimes but don’t worry I’ll make sure it doesn’t make me lose at all. I’m looking forward to wrestling here in Kingdom of Pride and making a name for myself and also winning Gold.

Carl Maloney: For those that think you can take advantage of Lucas because he is a rookie you are mistaken as he has me to look out for him. Lucas maybe a rookie but he has been training for years, wrestling is in the blood of my family and has been for years. Any way Kingdom of Pride I’m glad you have decided to sign my nephew because he is a unique talent for his age and is ready to evolve and create his legacy here in Kingdom of Pride.

Alex Avice: That is all we have time for, Lucas good luck and enjoy yourself here in kingdom of Pride because it’s the only place to be.

Once Alex has finished talking Lucas Kane Young and Carl Maloney shake hands with him then walk of down the corridor.

[Kirk Noble]

We return in a continuation of Kurt Noble's search for a new janitor. And in walks a small chap with a long coat, big sunglasses, and a fake mustache.

Knoble: That's you isn't it John.

JDP: Yes. V_V

John leaves.

[Kirk Noble]

"Just Like You" by Three Days Grace Blares over the PA system in the arena as Kid Flanagan makes his down to the ring holding a book bag, he gives some fans high fives before he gets into the ring. Finally he gets into the ring, he then starts going through his book bag, he then pulls out an two water pistols. He then yells "BOOM", then he leaps out of the ring and shoots some hot woman wearing an white t-shirt. Kid then yells "BOOBSHOT!". Kid Flanagan then gets back into the ring.

Ike Rose: The following match-up is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first…Kid Flanagan!

Tommy enters the arena to Eye of the Tiger by Survivor begins to play he is wearing a white cotton robe, the hood is hoisted on his head. His hands are taped as well as his feet, he moves forward a few feet, raises his arms as Hero begins to play. He does a 360 degree spin while holding his arm in the air. He brings his hands to his mouth, kisses them, places both arms across his chest to form an X, and than begins to make his way toward the ring. Following behind him several feet is his mentor Nick Hill.

Ike Rose: And his opponent… Tommy-

Before Tommy can make it down to the ring, Obscene runs through the curtain, chair in and, and slams it right into the back of Tommy Hargrove! Nick Hill turns towards him, and gets nailed tight in the head as well!

Keith Oswalt: What is Obscene doing?!?

Eric Witz: Taking down the cow, that’s what!

Obscene, looking crazed, begins to beat down on Tommy relentlessly, before stomping him into the steel. Kid Flanagan runs up the ram, but gets nailed by Obscene as well! Now, three men are down, and Obscene stands over them. He throws the chair down, and begins to exit.

Keith Oswalt: All those nice thing Obscene has said about Tommy Hargrove mean nothing! He’s the same as always!

Eric Witz: You mean awesome? I agree!

The scene fades out.

[Kirk Noble]

We now cut to the fans who stand, cheering at the camera, as a TV-MA logo appears in the corner.

Keith Oswalt: Well folks we are pretty much sold out here at the Cookeville Community Center! They're awesome!

Eric Witz: Shut up! We're TV-MA! It's SEEEEEEEKAAAAYYYY TIME!!!!!

Suddenly, a familiar song kicks into life over the speakers...

Bitches I hope you know
Bitches I hope you know

"Bitches" plays through the speakers and the crowd boos as Christian Kane walks through the curtain with his ESW World Championship on one shoulder, his ESW Junior Heavyweight title on the other and Dani Clarke at his side. CK stops just a few inches from the curtain and looks around the arena as several small barely audible anti-CK chants start up. Dani slowly rubs Kane's abs before he pulls her head back by the hair and they exchange a sloppy french kiss.

Ike Rose: Ladies and gentlemen would you please welcome Christian Kane!

After several seconds of this, he pushes her away and begins to walk down to the ring. The music keeps going and CK rushes down to the ring, moves around the side of it, then slides onto the hot apron. CK stands and raises both of his titles into the air, grinning. He puts the titles back onto his shoulders and takes the microphone from Ike Rose who now climbs out of the ring.

Kane: I know, I know. What am I doing oot here? Why don't I have my ring gear on? Why is she still in the ring with me?

CK points at Dani as he says this, then continues.

Kane: Well let me answer that for all of you right now. You see, next week, I go one on one with...your champion, Chris Hart, for the Valiant Title. And, well, I'm pretty fuckin' confident I'm going to win. So right here in this very ring, myself and Dani are going to have a...

Christian lowers the microphone and taps his chin, before smirking and raising it to his mouth again.

Kane: A live...pre-victory...sex celebration. Right here in this very ring...

Eric Witz: Woah!

Keith Oswalt: I...er...this is...relevant to my intrests...

Eric Witz: Pervert...

The fans cheer slightly at the thought of Dani naked as CK drops the mic and rips off Dani's red dress to reveal extremely revealing red lingerie. Dani then steps forward and rips off CK's shirt to reveal the Canadian's chiseled abs. Christian smirks a little before pushing Dani into the turnbuckle and trapping her. The fans cheer in anticipation of seeing Dani naked (even though they can see it on the internet, indy wrestling fans for you though I guess) as CK slowly begins to undo her bra strap before turning back around and picking up the mic.

Kane: AW HELL NO! You people thought I'd actually let you see MY bitch naked? No fuckin' way! Hahahaha!

The crowd boo heavily at this, especially the fat one in glasses who've never seen real titties before.

Kane: Look at all of you! Seriously! Look at all of you fuckin' bitches! Hahahaha! This one in the front row, right here, camera man get a look of this asshole!

The camera cuts to ringside where we see a rather large man/hillbilly shaking his fist and swearing at Christian. The camera cuts back to CK who is still laughing.

Kane: God damn, this is why I love pulling shit on you hillbillies, it's like you actually BELIEVED I'd let you see Dani's awesome titties! C'mon! Get a damn brain, people. Get a damn brain and realise not only am I the sexiest wrestler in this place, but I am the most talented wrestler in this place! I didn't come from a wrestling family like your fake champion! I worked my ass off to be where I am! I injected myself with drugs for you people! I popped pills for you people! I slept on park benches for you people! So excuse me for demanding your motherfuckin' respect! Excuse me for doing what I have to do to climb another rung on the ladder! I am an undisputed champion already, and I am the best man to lead this company forward. I have the look. I have the charisma and I have the talent.

Christian looks around at the fans with a serious look on his face before speaking again.

Kane: So once again, excuse me If I let a skinny, stupid looking kid, who got everything handed to him, keep MY title out of my grasp. So come next Sunday, you can say hello to your new Valiant Champion, The Canadian Sensation...Christian Kane, baby! And if you don't like. DEAL WITH IT. SeeKay oot, motherfucker.

CK drops the mic and Dani holds the ropes open for him as he climbs out and walks back up the aisle to the back to prepare for his match.

[Kirk Noble]

“It’s My Life” plays throughout the arena and the fans waste no time giving an overall appropriate reaction to Johnny Noble just as he slowly walks through the curtain and down the ramp. He gives the occasional group of fans a calm glance, but he does not lose focus as he walks to the ring and climbs the stairs. Johnny flashes a few more fans a calm glance as he steps into the ring and stands near the ropes, putting his hands on his hips and looking in the distance with intensity.

Ike Rose: The following match-up is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, weighing in at 230 pounds, and hailing from Ontario, Canada…Johnny Noble!

Keith Oswalt: He makes me sick sometimes Eric. Over the past few weeks, we’ve seen this metamorphosis from Johnny Noble, and it hasn’t been a positive change. Last week, he assaulted Chris Strike, who tried to thank him for helping him fight Storm. I just don’t understand this man!

Eric Witz: He’s a Noble, Keith. The kid’s an eye-opener, and a water-cooler discussion maker.

'Remedy' by Cold plays and Stephen Callaway and Missy step through the curtain. They stand back to back Callaway does a V1 prayer with his nose between his first two fingers, Missy holds her hands together in a gun shape like Charlie's Angels. The moment the two have got their taunt in place the smoke machine sends a cloud upwards behind them. As they walk to the ring, Callaway does his best to look intimidating while Missy walks, almost dancing behind him. Callaway walks up the steps and through the ropes while Missy sits on the turnbuckles and rolls in like Beth Phoenix. Once in the ring they stand side by side, Callaway doing his V1 Prayer and Missy holding her two pinkies together in the shape of an S.

Ike Rose: And his opponent, weighing in at 234 pounds, and hailing from Sacramento, California…Stephen Callaway!

Keith Oswalt: Stephen Callaway, however, is drawing attention to himself for different reasons. He has vehemently spoken out against comical wrestlers like Kid Flanagan, and is determined to put himself on the map by dominating his opponents.

Eric Witz: Nothing gets you closer to the top than beating the boss’s brother. Get him Callaway!

The bell rings, and both men slowly circle about, before locking up. Callaway moves quickly, locking Noble into a side-headlock. Noble then tries to lift up Callaway’s hands, but his hold is quite fierce. Callaway then grabs Noble’s arm, and pulls it back, locking in an armlock. Noble responds by sending his elbow back, right into Callaway’s jaw. As Callaway stumbles for a bit, Noble runs off the ropes, and takes down Callaway with a shoulder-block. He then runs off the perpendicular set of ropes, and rebounds, with Callaway kipping up and trying to hit a hip toss on him, but Noble counters the move, hitting him with a huge clothesline to floor him! Missy boos Noble, but he stands up, and then digs his boot into Callaway’s face, getting him a set of boos from the crowd, and various insults from Missy!

Keith Oswalt: Noble is ruthless. Not only has he beaten Stephen Callaway to the punch thus far, but now he’s using Missy to rub it in…literally!

Eric Witz: If Callaway wants any hope of a Syndicate title shot, he needs to get off his ass and do SOMETHING!

Noble then tries to grab Callaway, but he uses his legs to push Noble off of him and onto the canvas. Both men get up, and Noble charges Callaway, but he ducks, causing Noble to rebound off the ropes. Callaway then runs off the opposite ropes, and goes for a kick, but it’s ducked, and followed up with a German suplex from Noble! Noble then continues to stomp Callaway, opening a small cut above his eye. He lifts up Callaway, and drops him with a scoop slam! He then gets onto a nearby turnbuckle, and jumps off, attempting an elbow drop…but Callaway rolls out of the way! Noble stands up, gripping his arm in pain, and walks right into a Stephen Callaway Big Boot! Callaway then begins his own set of stomping on Noble’s face, before getting out of the ring, and dragging Noble’s face onto the apron. He hits an elbow onto Noble’s neck, before following it up with a kick to his temple!

Callaway gets back into the ring, as Noble holds his now red neck in pain, Callaway gets down, and locks in a sleeper hold on him, but Noble struggles every step of the way. He manages to pull himself up, with Callaway still holding the sleeper. Noble then drives an elbow into Callaway’s stomach, before moving like lightening, and hitting a quick backbreaker on him! Callaway stumbles against the ropes, and Noble grabs him, Irish Whipping him. Callaway rebounds, and catches Noble’s kick, firing back with an elbow to Noble’s nose! He goes down, and Callaway tries to lock in a Texas Cloverleaf, but Noble kicks him off, sending Callaway face first into a turnbuckle!

Eric Witz: Looks like these two would rather knock each other out than actually win the match.

Keith Oswalt: It’s all about the ego trip in this match. Both men want to prove that they’re the dominant one in this company, and using stiff attacks to the others faces, trying to knock them out, seems to be a pretty effective measure.

Missy yells at Noble to stop, but he merely ignores her, and hits an uppercut on Callaway. He then tries to Irish Whip Callaway, but Callaway holds onto the ropes, before firing back at Noble. Callaway hits some chops on Noble, before running off the ropes…right into a dropkick! Both men are now down, and Noble crawls over, going for a pin…

1…

2…

Kickout by Callaway!

Noble wastes little time, before running towards the ropes, rebounding, and hitting a shining wizard on Callaway! After bad-mouthing the referee about the previous near-fall, Noble stomps down on Callaway, before lifting him up. Both men begin to trade blows, clearly showing off their exhaustion. Noble kicks Callaway, and tries to lift him up, but Callaway slides over Noble, and rolls him up…

1…

2…

Kickout by Noble!

Keith Oswalt: Back to back near-falls for both men. Exhaustion’s starting to play in for both men, and their mistakes are costing them.

Eric Witz: That’s alright. Callaway has a way out of this. It’s that thing he always has. An-

Keith Oswalt: Yes, we get it! A freaking angle!

The second both men get up, Noble floors Callaway with a clothesline to regain control of the match. He then locks in his own sleeper-hold, but Callaway fights it, pulling himself back up. He elbows Noble, and runs off the ropes, hitting Noble with a flying forearm. He kips up, and floors Noble with a short arm clothesline. Noble gets up one more time, and this time, walks into the Everything Goes (Bodyslam into reverse DDT)! He then hops on the top turnbuckle, and hits a Moonsault on Noble!

Keith Oswalt: Callaway has taken control!

Eric Witz: WHAT DID I SAY BITCH?!?

Callaway gets in the corner, and prepares for the Calsikick (Superkick). He goes for it, but Noble ducks it, and responds with hiw own kick! He pins Callaway...

1...

2...

3!

Ike Rose: Here is your winner...Jonny Noble!

[Kirk Noble]

Again we join Kurt Noble looking for a new employee and this time he finds a suitable candidate. Clearly. As he's passing over the contracy to teh big black man (we won't say anything about his choice of Janitors....). But before the guy can sign John Parker jumps out of nowhere and delivers a Last Call to Cuba to the Nigel! He's clearly learnt a thing or two from Delikado. He grabs the contract and signs it himself.

Knoble: John! What the hell are you doing?!

JDP: I'm signing my new contract. How you HAVE to pay me!

Knoble: No, I don't. Because that contract isn't binding. And as it doesn't match your name it's void. And even if it had all worked. I'd fire you as soon as you messed up yet again.

JDP: But I so want the job! Just give me a chance! One more chance!

Knoble: I can see that. I tell you what. If a spot opens up on the roster I promise. I repeat, promise to give you a call. Ok?

JDP: Sounds good to me, bosss.

Knoble: I'm not your boss.

JDP: WHatever you say, boss.

John gives a thumbs up and rushes out with a grin. Kurt shakes his head and sighs before going back to his application process.

[Kirk Noble]

Bitches I hope you know
Bitches I hope you know

"Bitches" plays through the speakers and the crowd boos as Christian Kane walks through the curtain with his ESW World Championship on one shoulder, his ESW Junior Heavyweight title on the other and Dani Clarke at his side. CK stops just a few inches from the curtain and looks around the arena as several small barely audible anti-CK chants start up. Dani slowly rubs Kane's abs before he pulls her head back by the hair and they exchange a sloppy french kiss.

After several seconds of this, he pushes her away and begins to walk down to the ring. The music keeps going and CK rushes down to the ring, moves around the side of it, then slides onto the hot apron. CK stands and raises both of his titles into the air, grinning. He puts the titles back onto his shoulders then

Dani climbs into the ring as CK ascends to the top of the closest turnbuckle. He looks around at the fans before spotting a pretty girl. He puts a hand to his lips and blows a mocking kiss as her boyfriend stands at the side, becoming enraged by the gesture. CK laughs and looks around some more before stopping at a rather chubby girl. He immediately waves a disgusted hand and jumps off the turnbuckle.

He and Dani meet up in the middle of the ring once more and give each other another french kiss. Christian hands Dani his titles before telling her to leave 'his' ring, smacking her ass on the way out. The fans keep booing as CK walks to the ropes and blows another patronizing kiss at them. The music dies down as Kane smiles arrogantly in the ring.

The arena's sound system begins to play the opening of "Shipping up to Boston" and the fans begin to boo loudly as smoke fills the stage and red and blue strobes flash behind it.

The song kicks into gear and Adam Abel walks out from behind the curtain with a smug grin on his face, greeted by loud jeers from the crowd. Abel is smiling ear to ear as he looks all around the arena. Adam begins to walk to the ring with a confident and cocky look on his face. Abel takes a moment to scream something at a rowdy fan before sliding under the bottom rope and into the ring.

Abel climbs the turnbuckle and stares into the crowd as the jeers come down upon him.

Ike Rose: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a sixty minute time limit and is your scheduled main event. Introducing first, weighing in at a combined weight of 405 pounds, the team of Christian Kane and Adam Abel!

As "Heavy" by Collective Soul plays,the lights go down low and Big Bubba Olson comes down the ramp, holding three sparklers in his hands. He walks in front of the ring, and throws the sparklers down, creating a large pop as the lights come up. He slides into the ring, beats he chest, and climbs a turnbuckle, lifting his hands in the air.

The lights in the arena go down as the opening beat of Where The Hood At hit’s the dark arena as the top of the entrance ramp fills with smoke. At the fifteen second mark the beat picks up as pink and gold lights start to flash all around the arena. At the twenty second mark lasers start to flicker all around as the entire entrance ramp is now covered in smoke as Chris Hart emerges from the back dressed in his long surfer style shorts and sneakers. He walks down to the arena bobbing to the beat, slapping the occasional one’s hand whilst carrying a smile on his facer. He slides into the ring and goes to the far corner, climbing the turnbuckle and throwing one arm up in the air. Chris then flips off the rope and either stares down his opponent, waiting for the bell to start the match.

Ike Rose: And their opponents, weighing in at a combined weight of 595 pounds, the team of Chris Hart and Big Bubba Olson!

Keith Oswalt: Should be an interesting match, especially considering the dynamic between all four men here.

As the bell rings, Big Bubba Olson starts in the ring against Christian Kane and the two engage in a collar and elbow tie up. Olson is able to put Christian Kane into a hammerlock and he wrenches Christian’s arm before moving to a headlock, however from here, Christian Kane whips Olson off to the ropes, but Olson quickly rebounds back and nails a shoulder tackle on Christian Kane, knocking him to the mat. Staring down at Christian Kane, Olson now hit’s the ropes and jumps over Christian Kane as he flips onto his stomach and then hops to his feet as Olson again bounces off the ropes, but as Olson reaches a now standing Christian Kane, Christian leaps up and quickly whips off a hurricanrana on Big Bubba Olson, amazing even himself that he was able to hit such an agile move on Olson.

Eric Witz: Earthquake!

Keith Oswalt: That was quite the rumble, I didn’t know Olson could flip like that!

Eric Witz: Christian Kane never ceases to show us new things.

After hitting the hurricanrana, Christian Kane follows up on Olson by stomping him in the chest a few times before finally lifting him to his feet and throwing him to the ropes. As Olson comes back at Christian he delivers a huge lariat to Christian Kane, knocking him off of his feet. After doing this, Olson elbow drops Christian Kane and goes for a cover,

1...

Kick out!

Despite the kick out, Olson lifts Christian Kane back to his feet, but as he does this, Christian Kane rakes Olson’s eyes, blinding him for a moment. Holding his eyes as he wanders towards Adam Abel, thinking he’s Chris Hart, Christian Kane pushes Olson further to the corner. Here Olson tries to tag in Adam Abel, but for his effort he receives a solid punch to the face. After this, Christian Kane kicks him several times in the corner before tagging in Adam Abel who leapfrogs over the top rope and delivers a springboard pulling dropkick on Olson who sits in the corner, driving his boots into Olson’s face. After doing this, Adam Abel quickly gets back up before running to Chris Hart’s corner, looking at Hart and slapping him on the cheek and running towards Olson and delivering a vicious running knee to his head. As he does this, Hart tries, in vain, to get into the ring as the ref holds him out.

Keith Oswalt: Come on ref! They’re cheating!

Eric Witz: Christian Kane does not cheat! He prefers it to be called extracurricular affairs!

Keith Oswalt: Oh, shut the hell up.

As this goes on, Christian Kane and Adam Abel both choke Olson until the ref finally turns around and when this occurs, Abel lifts Olson up to his feet, and quickly whips him to the ropes. As Olson comes back to Abel, Abel hits him with a huge leap up kick, kicking Olson in the chest. After doing this, Abel lands facing away from Olson and finally backflipping and hitting a pele on Olson! Falling back to the ropes, Olson stands in the ropes as Abel now charges at him as he gets to his feet, however instead of being able to hit anything, Olson catches Abel and slams him head first into the mat with an STO!

Keith Oswalt: There we go! Things are finally turning around!

Eric Witz: So much for no bias.

After hitting the STO, Olson crawls towards his corner and is finally able to tag in Chris Hart, who charges into the ring and hit’s a running yakuza kick on Christian Kane, booting him to the outside of the ring and then turning his attention to Adam Abel. Here, Chris Hart lifts Abel up to his feet and delivers a few stiff punches to his face before putting him in a gut wrench and spinning him out with a gut wrench powerbomb. After hitting this, Chris Hart runs against the ropes and as Abel sits up, Hart delivers a stiff running boot to his face, kicking him in the face as he does so. After this, Hart stops and lifts Abel back to his feet before spinning around and delivering a vicious elbow to the point of Abel’s temple. After doing this, Hart lifts Abel onto his shoulder before driving him forward with a running forward diving fireman’s carry. After driving his shoulders into Abel’s stomach as he flips on top of him, Hart shows off his own speed by jumping onto the top rope and from here leaps off the top rope and nails a flash Legacy Bomb on Adam Abel (Spiral Tap)! Following this, Chris Hart covers Abel,

1...

2...

3!

Ike Rose: Here is your winners, via pinfall, at 9 minutes and 14 seconds, the team of Chris Hart and Big Bubba Olson!

Immediately after having his arm raised, Chris Hart is struck in the back of the head by a chair from Christian Kane. Turning around to see who attacked his partner, Olson also receives a chairshot to the head for his efforts. Kicking Olson out of the ring, Christian Kane grabs the chair and slams it repeatedly into Hart’s back before finally setting it up in the middle of the ring and grinning before grabbing Hart’s arms and placing his foot in the back of Hart’s head. After doing this, Christian Kane pulls Hart up and curb stomps him through the chair! However, despite nearly breaking the chair in the process of doing this, Christian Kane doesn’t seem satisfied as he again pulls Chris Hart back and curb stomps him a second time this time destroying the chair in the process! After doing this and leaving Chris Hart a bloody mess in the middle of the ring, Christian Kane only looks down at him and smiles as he yells at him allowing the show to fade to black..